Yesterday Jenn and I celebrated seven years of marriage. I still remember the ceremony vividly. At the conclusion of the service, we led the processional out of the chapel. After all the spectacle of the ceremony, we walked alone as a newly married couple into a waiting room while rest of the bridal party started slowly leaving the chapel. Jenn and I found a brief space between the pageantry of the wedding and the celebration of the reception. It was just us – the new Mr and Mrs – and we seized that calm moment.
Every year on our anniversary we’ve mimicked that moment from our wedding and taken time to make calm and find space for an us without kids. This year we took a retreat to the Don Cesar resort at St Pete Beach. Our period of seclusion was brief – only 36 hours. But that brief space has annually served to help us refocus midyear on where we want to focus, on how we want to live and on how we can do better at this whole two-become-one mystery.
Marriage is not easy. But perhaps it is simple. I give all of myself to Jenn; she gives all of herself to me.
In the context of a wedding or anniversary sojourn that can at times be easy. Add to the mix children, chores, work, friends and the remainder of life and it becomes hard to find myself, much less fully give myself away. So Jenn and I practice being married in these periodic trips. We take the easy road for a day or two here and there so that we can do a better job on the bumpier roads.
Of course we don’t vacation just to prepare for the future. There’s simply not another person I enjoy the company of as much as Jenn. I’m pretty sure she feels the same about me. That’s why we got married. Spending time with her is always at the top of my wish list and I’ll take any chance to spend time exclusively with her.